Charged Breakfast…
Well yesterday morning wifey and I got up and realized that there was absolutely no bread in the house so we decided to make fried dumplings (johnny cakes). Now, we have never successfully managed to create fried dumplings that are easy on the mouth but today we decided to give it our best shot. Wifey made the dough mix…flour, salt, baking powder…no problem. She turned over the dough to me for rolling into those little round shapes that would become our breakfast.
We decided that since past experiences were still evident we would deep-fry the dumplings. Seven or so went into the pot of extremely hot oil. Five (5) minutes later the dumplings are still not their expected colour so leave them on for a few more minutes.
All of a sudden explosions are heard. Scratchie dives for cover pulling down wifey with him (well not quite so dramatic but you get the idea) 
Really though all of a sudden there are explosions and dumplings are flying out of the pot taking oil with them and sadly we lost four…no not people, dumplings.
Apparently air pockets built up in the shell which had gotten hard and subsequently went boom. dwl. The Taller One advocates that we find a way to have timed explosions and sell our findings to the military as a personal attack weapon.
As for breakfast, well we had to let them cool then we broke out the jackhammers to break through the outer shell. Not quite…despite a tough exterior the dumplings made for a great breakfast with some bacon and fruit juice. I can tell you however, that we certainly won’t be marketing them anytime soon. Had to ask wifey if she had put any gunpowder or something in the dumpling dough though. Another novel idea is to just simply throw them at people. They could cause serious concussion. All the drama made for an entertaining morning.
Moral of the story, Don’t let HR officers and teachers into the kitchen to fry dumplings.
lol….what a hilarious post. what you guys need is my grandmother to give you a tutorial. she makes the best fried dumplings that i’ve ever tasted. it’s the type that you can eat by itself and be more than satisfied. *kiss mi teeth* i’m hungry now. THANKS ALOT!! *laughs*
lol,I am a member of the “can’t fry bakes” posse.Good to see I got company
LOL, that’s exactly why I leave them to the pros!
LOL! One of my coworkers came to work with small burn marks and told us his fried dumpling exploded on him. Of course we didn’t believe, but I guess you back up his story!
Natty is pretty handy in the kitchen but Johnny cakes elude her too. Do not feel any way.
haha, HR officers, will make you hug after making the dumplings..
Im hungry now..
You missin out on the butter and the cold water… and it the must be of soft consistency … not too tight.
I feel like a world class chef now ..wow!!!
i’m a veteran fryer. ive had oil splatter all over my hands and arms and chest and all sorts of body parts while frying bakes and other stuff. frying is not for the faint of heart
De fry-dumplin’ learnin’ curve was quite lengthy in my household as well. De piggies eventually conquered de counta flour tho…
ROTFL! I loved this. Absolutely hilarious.
hehe, Hey Scratchie, boy I tell you, I’ve never heard of dumplings exploding on anyone, you guys make me feel like a big time chef, hehe. This is quite a funny post.
That was funny! At least it was a family affair. Thanks for the laugh.
I’ve never tried it. Doh need nuh Gulf War inna mi ra$$ kitchen!
Had a helper who used to do them deep fried over a low fire in a covered dutch pot ….worked well every time… and they never came out like that horrible fluffy biscuit consistency (like the shyte they serve at KFC…ugh…me dash dem weh every time!)